70 JOHN WESLEY

tongues. But even so he never ceased to examine
himself; he was still his own chief interest, and
when he went down to Oxford in October, he
found that though he was " new" in many
things, as a convert should be, new in holiness, in
designs, in desires, in conversation and in actions,
he still could not find in himself the love of God
or of Christ; he had no settled, lasting joy in the
Holy Ghost. Still, he thought he had a measure
of faith ; his warming of the heart had not been
meaningless. But then, on a second visit to
Oxford, he met his old friend Delamotte, who
administered a severe, astringent dose. " You
are better than you were at Savannah/' Dela-
motte told him (so much had thought eroded his
devotion), " but you are not right yet. You
know that you were then blind, but you do not
see now. . . . You have a simplicity," he went
on, " but it is a simplicity of your own : it is not
the simplicity of Christ. You think you do not
trust in your own works, but you do trust in your
own works. You do not believe in Christ,'3

Pride ! Was he never to be rid of pride ?
Consulting the Bible by lots brought some relief
and on January 4th, 1739, he humbled himself
again by writing : "I affirm I am not a Christian
now ... I have not any love of God. I do not
love either the Father or the Son. . . . Again,
joy in the Holy Ghost I have not . . * I have not
the peace of God ! " Ultimately he did attain
the full sense of forgiveness of sin, with all its